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(no subject)
Feb. 18th, 2019 05:33 pmThe worst part about loving a band or artist, is that you can never go back to the point where you first fell in love with them, it's like the true real-life version of being banished from heaven.
That I can easily slip into arguing from a character's point of view, which is only partly a deliberate coping mechanism from me, but it's also an invlountary one.
Going in too deep into an argument prevented me from seeing the irony of the fact I:
* Was making a point about dissociative mechanism while also being on the verge of disconecting myself.
* Made the mistake of arguing the manifestation of dissociating against someone who may honestly misinterpret a sense of discomfort with oneself as a 'lack of having a personality' in how they characterize people.
Did I honestly think I would make an impact by stating my case? I'd actually thought so, I think I really believed that the other person was arguing in good faith, and for that matter I had also assumed that if they didn't want to consider my angle they would have said so, rather than use the fact I trusted them to turn my argument against me and present my position in a different way than I'd intended.
My issue isn't, I think, with boundaries - apart from the fact I'm DYING to know how some people get other people to really listen when they're doing something which gets too much for you, I'd love to know it for myself but I wouldn't know how to articulate my point on it right now; I think my problem is with the type of discourse which is made out of baiting and moving the goalposts and making sure only the argument-stirrer's boundaries are respected because they won't give you any closure about the part where they dicked on a strawman from what you said, with a dash of projection (you having a favourite doesn't mean I argue from favouritism when I consider your unfavourite, and arguing your favourite character's merits over the other has a time and a place and that time and place isn't with someone who has no interest in prioritizng a canon character over others).
Going in too deep into an argument prevented me from seeing the irony of the fact I:
* Was making a point about dissociative mechanism while also being on the verge of disconecting myself.
* Made the mistake of arguing the manifestation of dissociating against someone who may honestly misinterpret a sense of discomfort with oneself as a 'lack of having a personality' in how they characterize people.
Did I honestly think I would make an impact by stating my case? I'd actually thought so, I think I really believed that the other person was arguing in good faith, and for that matter I had also assumed that if they didn't want to consider my angle they would have said so, rather than use the fact I trusted them to turn my argument against me and present my position in a different way than I'd intended.
My issue isn't, I think, with boundaries - apart from the fact I'm DYING to know how some people get other people to really listen when they're doing something which gets too much for you, I'd love to know it for myself but I wouldn't know how to articulate my point on it right now; I think my problem is with the type of discourse which is made out of baiting and moving the goalposts and making sure only the argument-stirrer's boundaries are respected because they won't give you any closure about the part where they dicked on a strawman from what you said, with a dash of projection (you having a favourite doesn't mean I argue from favouritism when I consider your unfavourite, and arguing your favourite character's merits over the other has a time and a place and that time and place isn't with someone who has no interest in prioritizng a canon character over others).
(no subject)
May. 25th, 2018 04:32 pm
My penis is going to suffer forever now because of this Nowland
(no subject)
Sep. 11th, 2016 12:06 pmTickets ordered 11.09.2016 - Blixa Bargeld and Teho Teardo (15.9.2016, Reading 3, TLV)
The thing is, as a New Age survivor,
Sep. 3rd, 2016 09:33 pmI really wish to come across a spiritual doctrine that isn't about positivism, tone policing, repressing anger, and which doesn't only give answers about striving inside the existing power structures like the kyryarchy, and the heteronorm in particular (all the shiznit about family [kids] and 'one true soulmate'). We should worship how infinitely complex the world is instead (both in the physical sense and in the sense of being able to see our peers' life being as multi-faceted and 'messy' our own), how everything is crazy and chaotic and we're too small to see the big picture.
And also of course I wish white people (that includes me, I'm white people) didn't have to take ancient non-western beliefs and carstrate them so much and water it down to performing rituals that are supposed to be 'calming' (because God forbid we ever question authority! Especially New Age benefits some of the most privileged, comfortable people).
I've been let down and legitimately traumatized by the new age movement so much, I don't think what I wrote now is close to summing it up. This is really just an imporevement from not being able to say 'no' to spiritual abuse a few years ago.
And also of course I wish white people (that includes me, I'm white people) didn't have to take ancient non-western beliefs and carstrate them so much and water it down to performing rituals that are supposed to be 'calming' (because God forbid we ever question authority! Especially New Age benefits some of the most privileged, comfortable people).
I've been let down and legitimately traumatized by the new age movement so much, I don't think what I wrote now is close to summing it up. This is really just an imporevement from not being able to say 'no' to spiritual abuse a few years ago.
Books acquired - 03.09.2016
Sep. 3rd, 2016 01:01 pmFinding Love Through Bigfoot
Touching Narcissus - both by Jamie Fessenden
Touching Narcissus - both by Jamie Fessenden
I might not know a lot about the genre, but I never understood the need to insult the authors myself. Reading this now. I think it's important to remember LGBTQIA people are not and have never been a monolith!
http://www.jefferno.com/jeffs_blog/m-m-and-gay-fiction-is-there-a-difference-
http://www.jefferno.com/jeffs_blog/m-m-and-gay-fiction-is-there-a-difference-
Books acquired - 01.09.2016
Sep. 1st, 2016 09:32 pmChecking Him Out - by Debbie McGowan
Missing Piece - by Riina Y.T.
Of Gods and Monsters by - by Menoetius
Tutti Fruitti Rudi - by S.M. Franklin (ETA: finished)
The Slave - by Kate Aaron
Three's A Charm - by Maxene Novak (finished) (skipped the sex, I'm honestly only interested in the turnout for the characters).
Missing Piece - by Riina Y.T.
Of Gods and Monsters by - by Menoetius
Tutti Fruitti Rudi - by S.M. Franklin (ETA: finished)
The Slave - by Kate Aaron
Three's A Charm - by Maxene Novak (finished) (skipped the sex, I'm honestly only interested in the turnout for the characters).
